10th December, 2021
It’s your sister-girl, Olutemi, back with another insightful episode of our fresh interview series, “SINGLE AND JOYFUL”.
Today, we have another WILD Sister who’s blasting her Singlehood in Christ. Let’s get right into it.
OLUTEMI: Welcome, sister. Please, tell us about yourself.
EWAOLUWA: My name is Ewaoluwa Opalana. I’m a Chef and farmer, and I live in Lagos with my parents. I enjoy baking, hanging out with friends and touring new places.
OLUTEMI: I love your name (it means the BEAUTY OF GOD or GOD’S BEAUTY). A chef and a farmer? Ah ahn, chef Ewa na you oo. You plant the seeds, you watch them grow into fruits or veggies and then you now prepare them into delicacies. From start to finish something. I looovee eet; well done, sis!
What do you consider as the joy’s or advantages of being single?
EWAOLUWA: One of the privileges I currently enjoy as a single is the freedom to make choices and decisions to a large extent without having to put another person’s opinion into consideration. I’m not saying I’m inconsiderate in my decision-making. However, I don’t have to think twice before deciding, for instance, deciding to travel out of Lagos to attend a friend’s wedding.
There’s also the part of having my attention and focus ‘single’ in this season.
OLUTEMI: Yeesss! Being single has a lot of independence attached to it. Your major dependence would be on God and following His instructions; no third party interference per say.
What are the struggles/pressures of being single?
EWAOLUWA: There’s the lack of companionship. I mean, I have great friends but there’s only so much I can share with them. The sense of ‘this person loves me and is responsible for me’ is not really present. I sometimes have to check myself when speaking with friends because I don’t want to be a pest.
Then there’s also pressure from family and society. It’s tough having to explain over and over why I’m not married yet or turn down a proposal from someone that is ‘okay’ by their standards.
OLUTEMI: Hmmmmmn, lack of companionship can be a real thing but i have also seen married women lack this companionship. That’s why we must pray to marry right and not just marry to feel loved.
The pressure from family (though may come from a place of genuine love) can be sometimes overwhelming, especially when you don’t share the same values regarding marriage. May God give us wisdom to handle it all.
How do you respond to societal pressures of the most popular question, “when are you getting married?”
EWAOLUWA: For the most part, I ignore, especially coming from people who have no business asking in the first place. For the people that actually matter like my parents, I just calmly and humbly explain to them why I’m not going to rush into marriage and I also let them know how what they say affects me.
I also just speak to God. I draw strength from honestly pouring my heart to Him and reminding myself of His promise to me concerning my husband.
In addition, I try as much as possible not to let the fact that I’m not yet married inhibit me from doing the things I love to do.
OLUTEMI: Yes, pouring out our heart to God is a therapy that cannot be explained. It gives such unexplainable peace that only the Father can give, and the beauty of it is, He is always there, He hears it all and sees it all. An intimate relationship with God is beautiful really.
What scriptures keep you grounded and how do you apply them?
EWAOLUWA: In recent times it’s been Isaiah 62:4.
You Judah shall no more be termed Forsaken, nor shall your land be called Desolate any more. But you shall be called Hephzibah (my delight is in her), and your land be called Beulah (married) for the Lord delights in you, and your land shall be married (owned and protected by the Lord).Isaiah 62:4 AMPC
I also pray with PDDK’s book, ‘I am Married’. So basically, I pray them and declare them over myself. One other thing I’ve learnt to do is not confess the opposite when I’m with friends. There’s this thing going on online now where people make jokes about how they’re single and no one to love them, blah blah. God told me not to repeat those things.
OLUTEMI: Absolutely, our words and actions should align with what we confess. Don’t confess God’s promises in the morning and then when gisting with friends and colleagues in the afternoon agree with the enemy unknowingly. Our words are powerful, we shouldn’t joke with them.
What are your core values and what would you say your identity or self-worth is tied to?
EWAOLUWA: My core values are service, integrity and excellence.
I get my sense of self-worth and validation from God and God’s word. The knowledge that I’m loved and accepted by God is such an anchor for my soul.
OLUTEMI: Your core values wrap up nicely. Serving with integrity and excellence 👌. “The anchor for my soul part” reminds me of one of my favorite songs, “Anchor” by Hillsongs. God’s word is indeed our hope and anchor.
What’s the one thing you wish people could stop saying to you and the one thing you wish they’d do instead?
EWAOLUWA: “When is your own wedding?” and “Bring husband”.
What they could do instead is just sincerely pray for me.
OLUTEMI: People go as far as asking when your wedding is? Did you extend any invitation to them, wow! It is well; let me just keep quiet.
What is your ideal way of having FUN or should I say “living your best life”?
EWAOLUWA: I really enjoy having time out with friends and just laughing.
OLUTEMI: Laughter is a product of JOY IN THE HOLY GHOST, I believe. We laugh because our Father in heaven also laughs. Laughter is therapeutic and should be done daily.
Thank you, sis Ewa, for giving us insights into what being single looks like and taking us through the benefits amd struggles of it all. You will BE everything God has planned for you to BE in this season, and you’ll make the Father proud even in marriage, in Jesus name. Amen.
Sisters, I believe you enjoyed and gleaned from this beautiful conversation with, WILD Ewa. Please, don’t leave without dropping a comment.
I love you!
For the WILD Editorial Team