CHRISTIAN MOTHERHOOD INTERVIEW SERIES – 1

March 16, 2024

Hello FRUITFUL Leaders,

Shalom Shalom, I sincerely must say this must be the most wholesome greeting out there. It sure makes me happy, like I just get this goofy wide grin going on.

Before I go on and on, you know how much this is such a special month because its focus is on women and mothers all over the world. Well, it was International Women’s Day and Mothering Sunday this past week, and as the FRUITFUL women we have been called to be, motherhood takes a special place right there. By the way, how was Mother’s Day celebrated in your church? I believe it was a great time of jollification with plenty of dances and food, lol.

To celebrate all the women and mothers right here in the FRUITFUL community, two beautiful FRUITFUL Leaders have graciously shared with us the gains and pains associated with their journey of motherhood.

Y’all know how we do this, right? Grab your popcorn with some healthy juice and come right along on this journey with our beautiful leaders.

Mopelola FADAYOMI

MOPELOLA

TOLULOPE: Hello leaders, join me to celebrate and welcome this beautiful mother of teenagers, Mrs. Mopelola Fadayomi. She is a wife and a mother of two wonderful children, aged 19 and 16 years. Mopelola has been married for 22 years and currently lives in Ibadan, where she works as a pharmacist.
So, leader Mopelola, we would love to hear the description of your feelings when you became a first-time mum. And how has your experience as a mum changed you?

MOPELOLA: I think I felt a bit strange trying to wrap my head around the fact that I am now a mum. Though elated, the fact that another human being is now going to be 100% my responsibility made me wonder how this new role was going to play out.

My experience as a mum opened my eyes to the reality that the lives of my children depend on me and my actions or inactions will go a long way in impacting every area of their lives and who they become in life. This is such a huge task that I must depend on God on this journey because, at the initial stage, I was clueless about how to go about it. At the time I got married, we didn’t have as much information or classes on parenting as we do today except you go out of your way to look for. So, there was not any preparation on what to do except for what you have seen around you. You just know that after you marry, you start giving birth to children.

TOLULOPE: Truthfully, depending on God is the best way to learn the parenting hack.
Could you share with us any memorable challenges you faced as a mum and how you overcame them?

MOPELOLA: My son is very versatile and talented, so he had tried his hands on so many things and succeeded even before leaving secondary school. So he didn’t see any need to go to the university. To him, it was a sheer waste of 4 years when he could have invested those years in several profitable ventures based on his experience. Spending 4 years cramming notes and writing exams when he knows he won’t use the certificate seemed like a futile investment of his time.

His first two years in school were a very challenging one for us in the family. It was so serious that it started affecting his mental health. In summary, he was frustrated! I was scared and confused, I reached out to people that I felt he respects to help talk to him; brothers  in church, my brother, etc.

All through that period, I ensured I created a comfortable atmosphere for him to express his feelings to me at any point in time. I didn’t judge him but let him know I understood his perspective, and we supported him in the other stuff he was doing as much as possible.  We were just praying and asking God for wisdom for what to do because  all efforts (we tried different things) only lasted for a short while.

I had to just leave everything to God and stopped running helter skelter. In the process, God highlighted some scriptures to use to pray for him. By the time he got to the third year, he came home and was willing to finish school without any stress. Glory to Jesus!

TOLULOPE: WOW! This is a powerful and great testimony! God answers prayers and He can turn situations around. He is indeed Jehovah overdo. I love the testimony!
My next question for you, leader Mopelola, is: what resources or support systems have been helpful to you as a mother of two? This I believe would be helpful for other leaders in the community.

MOPELOLA:  For me , my greatest support has been the gift of men. When they were younger, I always got a  live-in nanny to help with taking care of them because  my work as a pharmacist was very demanding. I was working weekends and nights then, and my husband was only at home during weekends. This has its disadvantages because if such a situation isn’t handled well, your children can grow up not used to doing chores at home. It will then become very challenging trying to enforce it when they are older …trust me

TOLULOPE: I am with you on that leader,it might be challenging to enforce some duties when children are older. Also, the gift of men is very powerful, I believe my leaders here see it’s okay to ask for help always.
I would like to know if there are specific parenting strategies you used or techniques that worked for you in managing your household. Would you love to share them with the community?

MOPELOLA – I keep reviewing my strategy when I notice it isn’t working. I used to be the shouting mum for years (lol) but had to change when I realized I wasn’t getting any result. Then, I allowed my children to be comfortable talking to me about anything. I stress the fact that no matter what they do, they should open up to me that we will find a way to work things out together. Emphasizing  on the fact that we love them unconditionally.

TOLULOPE: You literally said it all, ma’and I have nothing to add to it.  Just ensure to have the trust of your children. So good, ma! I see God has helped you and continues to help you.
How do you find time for yourself while taking care of your children?

MOPELOLA:  Till now, this is still a challenge for me. Sometimes, I am just overwhelmed despite the fact that my children are teenagers now. Coping with the home, career, ministry, etc. can be a  handful sometimes. God opened my eyes to the fact that having a family to take care of is a privilege, and I am so important in this equation because He is depending on me to be a caretaker of these kids. So I thank Him for counting me worthy and ask Him for strength and wisdom to manage my time well. Thanks to CoachE for teaching us strategies to brutally eliminate distractions.

TOLULOPE: God continues to give you the strength and wisdom needed, and thanks to CoachE, aka Captain Bloom. She is really a powerhouse and our gift from God. Just if you are  wondering who Captain Bloom is, then this is a good time to consider joining the FRUITFUL community. You will find out who she is when you do.To my last question for you: what do you do to nurture your relationship with each of your children?

MOPELOLA:  I was  initially treating them the same way but later discovered they have different love languages . So I started relating with them based on their love needs, and I could see the difference in their response. Knowing your child’s love language is a must.

BRINGING THEM UP SPIRITUALLY

From when they were younger , I used to pray and read bible stories with them just like most of us do. But as they grew older, managing my time became more challenging, and I was inconsistent. My children’s section in church was really a blessing as they were doing a great job. There were times I felt I wasn’t doing enough in that area, especially  when I see other kids their age on fire for God. I went to God for help, and he highlighted scriptures to pray with. So, with my inconsistent efforts, I kept praying for them individually. To God be the glory, they are both doing very well spiritually now that people ask me how I did it.

My advice is to  keep trying your best to invest in their spiritual life no matter how little. Never give up and commit them into God’s hand .

TOLULOPE: Wow, Wow, Wow!. I enjoyed having this interview with you, and I believe you enjoyed answering our questions as well. There have been so many nuggets and much wisdom to take from you. Thank you so much, leader Mopelola, for devoting your time to having this interview with us.

You know the phrase,it keeps getting better. Well, that is what we have on the motherhood series, so here I am saying, stay tuned to the next interview.

Once again, Happy Mothers Day leaders, and I pray that God’s Grace is sufficient for you in all areas of your life.

Stay FRUITFUL leaders.

Shalom Shalom!
Tolulope,
For the FRUITFUL Editorial Team



 

 

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